2019: Story 2: The Wrong Side
This month was especially busy and so, despite having ideas for the prompt, there was absolutely no time to devote to developing them.
Anyway, for all it's worth, here is the story....
Prompt: New Me Word count: 1200 exactly
I stretch my legs in the cramped space, mentally berating myself for not booking tickets in the AC Chair Car. This is what happens when you put off travel decisions to the last moment, I chide myself. I wriggle to make myself comfortable in these ordinary seats-meant-for-2-but-allotted-to-3-people.
“Could you please move a little? You’re intruding into my space,” I tell the middle-aged woman sitting next to me. She gives me a sheepish look and turns to her teenage son, rubbing something onto his forehead. Soon, I’m assailed by the typical smell of one of these pain balms, and cover my nose with my handkerchief. Why is she travelling with an ill kid? Couldn’t she wait till he had recovered?
People continue to stream into the D3 coach of the Intercity Express even after all the reserved seats are taken. Ugh! Now they’ll be standing in the aisle all the way – no privacy at all. Why couldn’t everyone get their reservations done in advance? The Indian Railways really must ban people from traveling without reserved seats. God – there’s so much wrong with this country!
I open my newspaper and settle down to read of the latest happenings. What’s this ?! A kid had lost his life following an accident because no one had come forward to rush him to the hospital. Instead, people had been busy taking photographs and videos to share with their friends! How shocking….what a callous attitude people had nowadays. God – what a world we live in!
Even as I’m thinking of all that’s wrong with our world and people, there’s some commotion at the train door. I crane my neck to see what it is. Oh! It’s just one of these giggly teenagers you see nowadays – she’s chatting away to glory on her phone while trying to maneuver her luggage through the aisle. What a mindless chatterbox, she is! How modest girls used to be in our times, I think, and I can’t help looking with faintly concealed disdain at the girl, but my withering look is of no use because she’s too busy talking to notice. Bah – parents don’t even know how to bring up their kids these days!
The train chugs along, and the steady rhythm soon has me nodding off. I must have fallen asleep for a while because now, I’m rudely awakened by the same girl’s voice.
“Whaaat? I can’t hear you properly…tell me again? Ok, so you say I should take the blue one and not the red? Oh – yes, correct, the new dress is blue, right? Yeah, this blue one will make a perfect match!”
God - why is this girl screaming so? Can’t she wait for a proper connection?
I lean forward to see what she’s so excited about. Oh – it’s just a tiny bauble, those dangling earrings that are all the rage today. I don’t get how people can have them tugging on their earlobes day in and out. She’s looking at all the sets of jewelry that traveling hawker is trying to sell on the train. Why can’t she make her choice and settle down? How long is she going to spend admiring and commenting on each one?
My eyes roam idly over her face. Hey – she isn’t wearing even a small stud in her ears! Why is she making such a fuss then? Parents these days don’t teach their kids how to save their money instead of spending it on unnecessary things. No wonder we have this thing of the urban rich nowadays.
“Ok, I’ll take these two pieces,” the girl says to the hawker and pays her with a 50 – rupee note.
“No, it’s ok, keep the 5-rupees. Buy some sweets for your kids,” she’s telling the surprised woman.
Now I’m wide awake and worried about what time we’re going to reach Bangalore. Hope we get there in time – you never know with these Indian trains.
Hey, what’s with this girl, huh? Now she’s stopped a man who’s selling books teaching beginners the alphabets, fruits, vegetables, and numbers. The chap is grinning happily and thrusting books at me too.
“Shoo – take these things away. I don’t want your books,” I say.
But the girl can’t take the hint. She’s back to discussing something over the phone and describing each book, and asking which ones to take! Really – this is too much – she should have brought all her friends along with her on the train! Or can’t she go shopping in the city instead of making a dance and song of it while traveling by train and disturbing others? God - how impulsive these youngsters are, wanting to buy everything that they see! No value for money at all – how would they have that, given their parents’ pampering?
Oh, we’re finally reaching Bangalore station. Thank God, I can now go home and rest. Bigger relief is – I can get away from this girl with her constant chatter and impulsive buys. I must make my way out fast because I need enough rest. Tomorrow is a big day – it’s an important event for me as I’m conducting this seminar for the first time.
Morning has dawned bright and clear and luckily, I manage to make it to the venue well in time, without getting stuck in traffic that Bangalore is notorious for. Good – it looks like all the coordinators and participants have already gathered in the hall, and so, we can start the seminar exactly on time.
As the introductions begin, I see a familiar face. Hey, it’s the girl from the train yesterday! What is she doing here? What a coincidence!
After the introductions are over, we divide participants into groups with specific topics for discussion. I’m drawn to the one in which my train-girl is, and I linger around the group to see what they’re discussing.
The group coordinator asks, “Now I want each one of you to share something with us. Tell me what it is that you’ve done anytime in your life that caused other people either joy or pain.”
I smirk. I know a very good example of how a girl in this group has caused me pain. But hey, the girl is saying something, so I lean in to listen.
“It’s not anything big, but I can’t remember anything else to tell here. Whenever I go on a train journey, I try to buy some small things from the people who come selling on the train. They are at least trying to earn a sincere living rather than begging. So I buy something from them so that it’s like encouraging them. Even if I don’t have any use for those items, I try to buy things which I can give someone else. Like just yesterday, I bought earrings for our flat watchman’s wife. I also bought some colorful alphabet and fruit-describing books for our maid’s young kid. In this way, I get to help some people at least in a small way, and pass on some joy to them.”
I feel like I’ve been punched in the solar plexus. I think I’m on the wrong side of this “Joy of Giving” seminar I’m conducting. I should be sitting in that girl’s place, and she should be standing here.
So, when deadline day came up, I did something I rarely do - I took a shortcut. I had a story previously written for my blog, but it was a shorter word count. So, I expanded it a bit. And because I wanted to put some effort into the story, I re-wrote the narrative from 3rd person to 1st person and changed the tense from past to present.
Technically, it's a different story but I can't help feeling I didn't do full justice to the purpose of the exercise.
Anyway, for all it's worth, here is the story....
Prompt: New Me Word count: 1200 exactly
I stretch my legs in the cramped space, mentally berating myself for not booking tickets in the AC Chair Car. This is what happens when you put off travel decisions to the last moment, I chide myself. I wriggle to make myself comfortable in these ordinary seats-meant-for-2-but-allotted-to-3-people.
“Could you please move a little? You’re intruding into my space,” I tell the middle-aged woman sitting next to me. She gives me a sheepish look and turns to her teenage son, rubbing something onto his forehead. Soon, I’m assailed by the typical smell of one of these pain balms, and cover my nose with my handkerchief. Why is she travelling with an ill kid? Couldn’t she wait till he had recovered?
People continue to stream into the D3 coach of the Intercity Express even after all the reserved seats are taken. Ugh! Now they’ll be standing in the aisle all the way – no privacy at all. Why couldn’t everyone get their reservations done in advance? The Indian Railways really must ban people from traveling without reserved seats. God – there’s so much wrong with this country!
I open my newspaper and settle down to read of the latest happenings. What’s this ?! A kid had lost his life following an accident because no one had come forward to rush him to the hospital. Instead, people had been busy taking photographs and videos to share with their friends! How shocking….what a callous attitude people had nowadays. God – what a world we live in!
Even as I’m thinking of all that’s wrong with our world and people, there’s some commotion at the train door. I crane my neck to see what it is. Oh! It’s just one of these giggly teenagers you see nowadays – she’s chatting away to glory on her phone while trying to maneuver her luggage through the aisle. What a mindless chatterbox, she is! How modest girls used to be in our times, I think, and I can’t help looking with faintly concealed disdain at the girl, but my withering look is of no use because she’s too busy talking to notice. Bah – parents don’t even know how to bring up their kids these days!
The train chugs along, and the steady rhythm soon has me nodding off. I must have fallen asleep for a while because now, I’m rudely awakened by the same girl’s voice.
“Whaaat? I can’t hear you properly…tell me again? Ok, so you say I should take the blue one and not the red? Oh – yes, correct, the new dress is blue, right? Yeah, this blue one will make a perfect match!”
God - why is this girl screaming so? Can’t she wait for a proper connection?
I lean forward to see what she’s so excited about. Oh – it’s just a tiny bauble, those dangling earrings that are all the rage today. I don’t get how people can have them tugging on their earlobes day in and out. She’s looking at all the sets of jewelry that traveling hawker is trying to sell on the train. Why can’t she make her choice and settle down? How long is she going to spend admiring and commenting on each one?
My eyes roam idly over her face. Hey – she isn’t wearing even a small stud in her ears! Why is she making such a fuss then? Parents these days don’t teach their kids how to save their money instead of spending it on unnecessary things. No wonder we have this thing of the urban rich nowadays.
“Ok, I’ll take these two pieces,” the girl says to the hawker and pays her with a 50 – rupee note.
“No, it’s ok, keep the 5-rupees. Buy some sweets for your kids,” she’s telling the surprised woman.
Now I’m wide awake and worried about what time we’re going to reach Bangalore. Hope we get there in time – you never know with these Indian trains.
Hey, what’s with this girl, huh? Now she’s stopped a man who’s selling books teaching beginners the alphabets, fruits, vegetables, and numbers. The chap is grinning happily and thrusting books at me too.
“Shoo – take these things away. I don’t want your books,” I say.
But the girl can’t take the hint. She’s back to discussing something over the phone and describing each book, and asking which ones to take! Really – this is too much – she should have brought all her friends along with her on the train! Or can’t she go shopping in the city instead of making a dance and song of it while traveling by train and disturbing others? God - how impulsive these youngsters are, wanting to buy everything that they see! No value for money at all – how would they have that, given their parents’ pampering?
Oh, we’re finally reaching Bangalore station. Thank God, I can now go home and rest. Bigger relief is – I can get away from this girl with her constant chatter and impulsive buys. I must make my way out fast because I need enough rest. Tomorrow is a big day – it’s an important event for me as I’m conducting this seminar for the first time.
Morning has dawned bright and clear and luckily, I manage to make it to the venue well in time, without getting stuck in traffic that Bangalore is notorious for. Good – it looks like all the coordinators and participants have already gathered in the hall, and so, we can start the seminar exactly on time.
As the introductions begin, I see a familiar face. Hey, it’s the girl from the train yesterday! What is she doing here? What a coincidence!
After the introductions are over, we divide participants into groups with specific topics for discussion. I’m drawn to the one in which my train-girl is, and I linger around the group to see what they’re discussing.
The group coordinator asks, “Now I want each one of you to share something with us. Tell me what it is that you’ve done anytime in your life that caused other people either joy or pain.”
I smirk. I know a very good example of how a girl in this group has caused me pain. But hey, the girl is saying something, so I lean in to listen.
“It’s not anything big, but I can’t remember anything else to tell here. Whenever I go on a train journey, I try to buy some small things from the people who come selling on the train. They are at least trying to earn a sincere living rather than begging. So I buy something from them so that it’s like encouraging them. Even if I don’t have any use for those items, I try to buy things which I can give someone else. Like just yesterday, I bought earrings for our flat watchman’s wife. I also bought some colorful alphabet and fruit-describing books for our maid’s young kid. In this way, I get to help some people at least in a small way, and pass on some joy to them.”
I feel like I’ve been punched in the solar plexus. I think I’m on the wrong side of this “Joy of Giving” seminar I’m conducting. I should be sitting in that girl’s place, and she should be standing here.
Niceeee....
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DeleteNice Mami 🙏
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